How a cab driver taught me that what we think differentiates us as human-beings actually unifies us
Last night, I decided to reciprocate my cab driver’s chattiness. Coming back from a client’s office located outside of the downtown core, I was looking at a good half-hour ride and felt in good spirit since the presentation had gone really well.
Picking from what Dale Carnegie taught us all, I started asking him question about himself.
He told me about his native Iran, about moving to Canada 30-odd years ago, about how not speaking French in Québec made his life so difficult he moved to Toronto, about Trump and the U.S. soi-disant love for democracy and justice.
I briefly told him what I do and we chatted about marketing for a second, and quickly switched to psychology and sociology. He had this great rationale for human relativism, bringing it all the way down to the atomic-level. He went on for a bit, listing all the different factors that influences ones inklings, preferences, pre-conceived ideas, predisposition, perspectives, attitudes, capacities and abilities, etc.
He chatted for a while, and then apologized. “I hope I’m not talking too much” he said. I reassured him. I love listening to people.
There was a silence. And because I apparently cannot just enjoy a conversation without eventually instrumentalizing it, I started asking him about luxury cars.
“Why do you think people buy luxury cars? Bimmers? Mercedes? Audis?”
He replied something along the line of “For themselves, but mainly to impress others”. Not a surprising answer in itself. So I probed. Asked him about himself and his personal experiences. And that’s when he said something that stood out to me.
“Me, I’m more… like an exception. But most people do it to show-off…”
I phased-out as he kept talking: I was experiencing a little ah-ah moment.
Truth has the unique trait of being instantly recognizable when encountered.
“Everybody is (___insert commentary on human nature here_______)… but I’m an exception”
Don’t we all think that?
I know I do.
I know you do too.
Sure, like everything in human nature, there are exceptions.
But in so many different aspects of our lives, we recognize outward influences, but feel we do it “our way”. Think about the music you listen, the clothes you wear, the aspirations you have, the types of people you like, etc.
Think about the brands you choose…
If there’s something that is true about humans, is that we all feel the need to be different. And in doing so, we are all alike.
My cab driver said something else that made me laugh and was resoundingly true: “Everything we think separates us from animals… that’s maybe 5–10% of who we are. We’re like… 90% animal!”.
Another truth. #GottaWatchDemNationalGeographics
In closing, a very fitting quote from Dale Carnergie’s book “How to Win Friends and influence People”:
“When dealing with people, remember you are not dealing with creatures of logic, but with creatures bristling with prejudice and motivated by pride and vanity.”
Truth.
ABOUT THIS COLUMN
To be the best strategic planner I can be, I believe I need to be good a two things: transforming data, research and observations into original thinking, and conveying it in a clear and thought-provoking manner.
I use Medium to challenge myself: take one of the many thoughts I might have daily (and normally just go like “Uh!”, and move on) to commit to “paper”.
The twist: I try to go from idea to publishing IN ONE SITTING.
The more I do this, the better I’ll get at formulating and communicating provocative thinking.
In the process, I’d be honoured to deserve a comment, a clap (or a few), a share and even (dare I say) a follow from you. Many thanks in advance!
PEACE,
JCMK
